Then Will I Make Weak Things Become Strong

We met with the new doctor and Mark had to finish one last test. The doc did a preliminary review of Mark's results. I'll give you just a little of what he went over, as we'll have the full report at the end of next week.

First the good news. The doc could not be happier with the results of Mark's non-verbal tests. Mark is well above average (the average being healthy people with no brain injuries) for his visual memory and motor skills. In a nutshell, his right brain is working great. We even gave Mark a little round of applause for having done so well. We were both beaming.

Then it was the dreaded bad news, of which we were fully prepared to hear, as we are well aware of the deficiencies. Just not aware of how serious the deficiencies actually are. The doc showed us a bell curve that measures how the average person performs on these same tests. Then he drew the lines for where Mark is on the bell curve for his performance on these tests. His right brain results are far to the right, meaning very good. His left brain results are FAR to the left, even into the negatives. I must admit that I didn't think he was THAT bad. Mostly because Mark can speak and carry on a conversation, albeit sometimes very slowly and with much repetition on my part. But as we sat there discussing things, the doctor had Mark do some things that demonstrated the results. He asked him to repeat the following: The Ragged Rascal Ran Rapidly. Mark couldn't remember the first word. If you go word-by-word, Mark can do it. But if you give him more than that, he has no memory. The doctor got out his rubber brain model and showed us, again, what was missing and how all these things are playing out in Mark's brain. I wish I could do justice to the explanations, but I can't remember everything, nor do I have a clue about what I'm trying to explain. Basically, because of Mark's injury and subsequent brain tissue removal, he is severely impaired in his cognitive language skills. But we found there is somewhat of a silver lining in all of this.

In some of Mark's testing the doctor had him do a "squeeze" test. He held a meter in his hand and squeezed it as hard as he could. He did this with each of his hands. His right side was weaker than his left. The doctor started to explain that because of the severity of the injury to the left brain, Mark was suffering some weakness on his right side. I explained to the doc that Mark's right pectoral muscles never developed and that the only thing he does with his right hand is write. Anything physical he does left handed: bat, golf, arm wrestle, shoot. The doctor was very encouraged by this news. He said that tests have shown that people who are ambidextrous show language capacity int he right side of their brains. This gave the doctor much hope that Mark may already have some language pathways on the right side of his brain that will aid in his cognitive recovery of his language skills. Who would have thought that a physical impairment that Mark has hated and been ashamed of his entire life would end up being a blessing to him. We have to look at each and every tiny plus on our side as a tremendous blessing. Especially if it gives us even the slightest chance of any improvement.

Because of Mark's severely impaired cognitive language skills, he is unable to acquire, maintain or effectively retain work. So, we move on to the next step for him, which is vocational rehab. We will be meeting with them on Thursday for an orientation, and then they'll assign us to a counselor who will do additional testing, look at the doctors' reports, and make determinations as to what kind of work Mark can try to train for and attain. This is a difficult thing to accomplish. It takes much work on Mark's part, additional training to learn new skills, and a benevolent employer that is willing to work with someone like Mark. We have much work to do that is going to take quite some time. And all the while we have to try to sustain ourselves financially, emotionally and mentally. Once again the challenges seems overwhelming. But I wish you could have heard Mark talking about all of this. He thanked the doctor profusely for his willingness to help us. He told the doctor that he wants to be able to work again, but if he never does, then that's life and we'll just deal with it when it comes. His attitude has improved greatly over the last week or so. It has much to do with prayer and a benevolent Father in Heaven.

“And if men come unto me I will show unto them their weakness. I give unto men weakness that they may be humble; and my grace is sufficient for all men that humble themselves before me; for if they humble themselves before me, and have faith in me, then will I make weak things become strong unto them” (Ether 12:27).

Blessing of the Day: weak things made strong